Way back in 2006, during the prehistoric era of my blogging life (you know, when Friendster testimonials were still a thing and “selfies” were just called pictures of yourself), I started collecting a quirky little list: funny Philippine store names.
Fast-forward to today — many social media posts, memes, and controversial senate hearings later — our nation has not lost its touch for humor. In fact, it seems Filipino entrepreneurs have only sharpened their wit, proving once again that we can sell anything and make you chuckle while we’re at it.
So here I am, years later, updating my treasure trove of hilariously inventive store names. It’s a collection that reminds us that beyond the commerce, there’s always comedy.
Hope you enjoy this playful roundup of wit, wordplay, and unprecedented creativity I’ve amassed… because in the Philippines, even our business names know how to do business with a punchline.
Drumroll, please… 🥁 Here are some of the punniest, wittiest, and downright laugh-out-loud gems you’ll spot while strolling through our streets:
Adobo Putoshop
Avril Living Furniture & Interiors
Bangga Ka ‘Day? Auto Repairs
Blow Jab Boxing Ring
Bob Marlin Restaurant
Bread Zeppelin
Brew Ha! Coffee Shop
Brews Almighty Cafe
Cereal Killers Cafe
Cha’ng Inuh Milktea
Chicago Bulalo
Chickpoint Beer House
Chizmozza Mozzarella Sticks
Coco Martea
Cut N’ Face Beauty Parlor
D’ Architeethure Dental Clinic
Dirty Hairy Dog Grooming Salon
D2 Na Me Wer Na U? Bar & Resto
EtceteRice
Eye Ronick Photography Studio
Gigabykes Quality Big Bikes Dealer
Eat My Balls fishball cart
Egg Sheeran
Emily in Pares
For Heaven’s Shake!
Fries The Lord
Grilling Me Softly With This Tong
Hair Force One Men’s Salon
Hair It Is! Salon
Hairs To You Beauty Salon
Hand Job Nails & Spa
Hard Cock Cafe
Hari Pata
Hurry Cutter The Barber Shop
James Tailor
Jesus Fries
John Lemon Juice Bar
Koshkosh Laundry
LGBT (Lomi•Goto•Bulalo•Tokwa’t Baboy)
Libing Things Funeral Parlor
Lord of the Ribs
Lord of the Rinse Laundry Shop
Lord of the Wings Lechon Manok
Lulugawan Kita
Mang Inasar BBQ
McDollibee
Mekeni Rogers Kapampangan Restaurant
Nak Nam Fu-Cha Milk Tea
Para Faucet Laundry Services
Philippine Hair Lines
Pizza Ng Ina Mo
Probinsiomai
Pusit To The Limit Squid Stall
Pussies & Bitches Petshop
Put A Henna Mo! Tattoo Booth
Rice To Meat You
Robocock Chicken Feeds
Scissors Palace Barber Shop
Shawarma Geddon
Shoeperman Repairs
Sinabon Laundry Shop
Soaperman Laundry Center
Sofa So Good Furniture
Starbuhoks Salon & Spa
Starducks Balut
Starwash: Attack of The Clothes Laundry Shop
La Kih Ti-Tea
Spotifries
Summa Cum Laundry
Superhairo Barber Shop
SurpRice! Eatery
Susan’s Roses Flower Shop
Tailor Swift Dress Shoppe
Tang Inasal
Tea Li Ling Pearl Drinks
Tuna Turner Takeout Grill
Washful Thinking Laundromat
Wash Me Neyney Coin Laundry
Wash Your Problem Laundry Shop
Wi-Pie To Go
Wool Street Barongs